(This is the letter I sent to KFC NZ.)
Dear KFC in New Zealand,
I’m from Philippines and I am quite addicted to your mushroom soup (quite addicted is actually an understatement). I have a very good friend in New Zealand who we shall call Moonie. Moonie is an awesome person but she hates soup with passion (*gasps* Can you believe THAT?) She and her other friends even often say “Soup is poop.” which greatly offends me and our other pro-soup friends too.
So here I am, attempting to remedy her aversion to soup.
Here’s my little request. Can you please offer mushroom soup too in New Zealand? It’s cold in NZ after all. It just makes sense that they should have soup too. And above all, we want Moonie and the rest of NZ citizens to taste your delicious mushroup soup, don’t we?
A Lover Of Soup
P.S. Next stop is UK. There’s also a lovely “soup is poop” member there named Squarah.